hooray beer
if i get caught drinking again i'm fucked. if i get drug tested, i'm fucked. this weekend, i just didn't give a shit. here are some noteworthy events from the weekend.
friday me and a few guys just stayed in the dorms, drank and played hold em. when we got in the building through the side door with our alchol. we took the elevator and there was a guy and a girl already in. when we got off the elevator eric told the girl, "have a nice ride". i've got a dirty mind so i laughed very hard.
eric has said this before, but he said it again friday night. it makes me laugh every time i hear it: "i'm hungry for vagina"
yea sorry. i don't feel like writing a story. these are just like random parts from my weekend all mashed together.
this guy drew said, "you gotta have thriller if you listen to vinyl." he then turns to my friend will who's also in the room and says, "i know you got thriller". hehe.. he said this because will is black.
eric showed us the first porno dvd he's ever purchased. on the jacket of the dvd are the most nasty girls i've ever seen. it looks like dudes doing dudes. drew read the back of the dvd aloud, "this scene is so hardcore it is illegal in 5 states." the next exerpt is my favorite: "tiny teenies take massive loads on their faces". drew commented, "they're like twelve year olds! you're sick eric."
sat night.
after work i went to my roomate eric's frat for some alcohol consuming. at the party eric said to this friend of mine, "mary we gotta sleep together sometime."
after a decent time, and after a full beer was poured on my back, we got home safely. this is some of the shit that happened party:
i was on my computer while everyone was chillin. eric had some friends over from back home visiting him. this kid matt was in awe of our handicap bathroom. he entered it and said "you can throw a 6th grade dance in here! it's fuckin bigger than my room." i laughed a lot. i was stoned too. i was really out of it. i wrote down some funny things on my "notepad" computer program cuz i have a shitty memory. some of the convos i had with people online i wrote down i don't recall writing. i didn't have the presence of mind to write who said some of the things. oh well.
i was a bit messed up. i was eating some Bea One rolls (sushi) from work. they were delicious. they were chillin next to my keyboard. i was talking to people online, drinking my beer, and eating. that's a lot of stuff. well, i kind of made a boo boo. i was eating and then forgot that i wasn't touching my keyboard. so i started to "type" on the rolls, wasabi, and ginger. after a second i realized what i was doing. fuck.
"uyhhh i'm intoxicated."
"uhh you're inbriated."
that's typed in my notepad verbatim. spelling was a bit off. i'm not sure who said what in that conversation. all i know is two people said those things.
i think this next one was between me and The Jeffrey. maybe not. it was said after i told someone about the full beer that was poured on my back.
The Jeffrey (i think):your life could be on jerry springer
me: no, it could be on jenny jones.
right after that convo, i typed this in the notepad, "fuck. i just tried to type on my rolls and wasabi again." haha i did it twice.
one of eric's other friends that stayed in our room was named rich. he slept with eric. i slept with yolanda. this is not the first time eric has be shafted. after mud wrestling (first semester) i showered with yolanda and fawn (i protect names. and i do it really well.) eric showered alone. bahh hahahaha.
ok sorry, i was side tracked.
rich says, "ERIC!" as he's puking in the trash can beside his bed. "ERIC! DID YOU PUKE?"
"yeah. why?"
"you're probably going to puke on me."
"i won't."
"just keep puking that way ok?" (that way meaning away from him and towards the trash)
soon the stench of vomit reaches rich, he exlaims "oh shit that smells like crap!"
matt passed out on the floor. sucked to be him. well there was another trash can in the middle of the room. he was passed out in a ball; curled up and faced down. it looked as if he was islamic and praying towards mecca.
this convo really isn't funny. i'm just random. skip it cuz really, there's no substance.
A: how was your weeekend
me: is it the weekend?
me: hahhahah
A: i dont know bout america but its weekend in canada!
me: hehe... what day is it?
A: 29th
A: now its the 30th
me: which is what day of the week?
A: which is what day of the week hahah your drunk arent you
A: sunday
me: what gare it away?
A: haha what
me: i mean...
me: fuck. i just tried to type on my rolls and wasabi again.
A: lol what im soo confussed
me: me too
me: i miss you
A: i miss you 2
A: but your soooo random tonight
me: i'm sorry
me: am i spelling ok?
A: how drunk are you
me: if you answer my question honestly, i'll answer yours
A: ahhaha okk its a game
A: goo
me: hehe
A: ask
me: are you dating right now?
A: honestly no
me: do i get to ask another question?
A: are you drunk
me: if you can tell by my typing.
A:lol yeahh
A: how much you drink
me: i can't remember
me: maybe 11 beers in a hour and a blunt
A: wow
A: good times
me: do you know the muffin man?
A: the muffin man
me: the muffin man
A: who lives on drurry lane?
me: :D
"it tastes so good when it hits your lips"
friday me and a few guys just stayed in the dorms, drank and played hold em. when we got in the building through the side door with our alchol. we took the elevator and there was a guy and a girl already in. when we got off the elevator eric told the girl, "have a nice ride". i've got a dirty mind so i laughed very hard.
eric has said this before, but he said it again friday night. it makes me laugh every time i hear it: "i'm hungry for vagina"
yea sorry. i don't feel like writing a story. these are just like random parts from my weekend all mashed together.
this guy drew said, "you gotta have thriller if you listen to vinyl." he then turns to my friend will who's also in the room and says, "i know you got thriller". hehe.. he said this because will is black.
eric showed us the first porno dvd he's ever purchased. on the jacket of the dvd are the most nasty girls i've ever seen. it looks like dudes doing dudes. drew read the back of the dvd aloud, "this scene is so hardcore it is illegal in 5 states." the next exerpt is my favorite: "tiny teenies take massive loads on their faces". drew commented, "they're like twelve year olds! you're sick eric."
sat night.
after work i went to my roomate eric's frat for some alcohol consuming. at the party eric said to this friend of mine, "mary we gotta sleep together sometime."
after a decent time, and after a full beer was poured on my back, we got home safely. this is some of the shit that happened party:
i was on my computer while everyone was chillin. eric had some friends over from back home visiting him. this kid matt was in awe of our handicap bathroom. he entered it and said "you can throw a 6th grade dance in here! it's fuckin bigger than my room." i laughed a lot. i was stoned too. i was really out of it. i wrote down some funny things on my "notepad" computer program cuz i have a shitty memory. some of the convos i had with people online i wrote down i don't recall writing. i didn't have the presence of mind to write who said some of the things. oh well.
i was a bit messed up. i was eating some Bea One rolls (sushi) from work. they were delicious. they were chillin next to my keyboard. i was talking to people online, drinking my beer, and eating. that's a lot of stuff. well, i kind of made a boo boo. i was eating and then forgot that i wasn't touching my keyboard. so i started to "type" on the rolls, wasabi, and ginger. after a second i realized what i was doing. fuck.
"uyhhh i'm intoxicated."
"uhh you're inbriated."
that's typed in my notepad verbatim. spelling was a bit off. i'm not sure who said what in that conversation. all i know is two people said those things.
i think this next one was between me and The Jeffrey. maybe not. it was said after i told someone about the full beer that was poured on my back.
The Jeffrey (i think):your life could be on jerry springer
me: no, it could be on jenny jones.
right after that convo, i typed this in the notepad, "fuck. i just tried to type on my rolls and wasabi again." haha i did it twice.
one of eric's other friends that stayed in our room was named rich. he slept with eric. i slept with yolanda. this is not the first time eric has be shafted. after mud wrestling (first semester) i showered with yolanda and fawn (i protect names. and i do it really well.) eric showered alone. bahh hahahaha.
ok sorry, i was side tracked.
rich says, "ERIC!" as he's puking in the trash can beside his bed. "ERIC! DID YOU PUKE?"
"yeah. why?"
"you're probably going to puke on me."
"i won't."
"just keep puking that way ok?" (that way meaning away from him and towards the trash)
soon the stench of vomit reaches rich, he exlaims "oh shit that smells like crap!"
matt passed out on the floor. sucked to be him. well there was another trash can in the middle of the room. he was passed out in a ball; curled up and faced down. it looked as if he was islamic and praying towards mecca.
this convo really isn't funny. i'm just random. skip it cuz really, there's no substance.
A: how was your weeekend
me: is it the weekend?
me: hahhahah
A: i dont know bout america but its weekend in canada!
me: hehe... what day is it?
A: 29th
A: now its the 30th
me: which is what day of the week?
A: which is what day of the week hahah your drunk arent you
A: sunday
me: what gare it away?
A: haha what
me: i mean...
me: fuck. i just tried to type on my rolls and wasabi again.
A: lol what im soo confussed
me: me too
me: i miss you
A: i miss you 2
A: but your soooo random tonight
me: i'm sorry
me: am i spelling ok?
A: how drunk are you
me: if you answer my question honestly, i'll answer yours
A: ahhaha okk its a game
A: goo
me: hehe
A: ask
me: are you dating right now?
A: honestly no
me: do i get to ask another question?
A: are you drunk
me: if you can tell by my typing.
A:lol yeahh
A: how much you drink
me: i can't remember
me: maybe 11 beers in a hour and a blunt
A: wow
A: good times
me: do you know the muffin man?
A: the muffin man
me: the muffin man
A: who lives on drurry lane?
me: :D
"it tastes so good when it hits your lips"
posted by icon at 3:02 PM
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